On the eve before his wedding day Tom's father decided to share one of his secrets to a long and happy marriage. He said, 'Tom, on my wedding night in our honeymoon suite I took off my pants, handed them to your mother,and said, 'Here - try these on.' She did and said, 'These are too big, I can't wear them.' I replied, 'Exactly, I wear the pants in this family and I always will.'
'Ever since that night we never had any problems.' 'Hmmm,' said Tom. He thought that might be a good thing to try. So the following day on his honeymoon, he took off his pants and said to his wife, 'Here - try these on.' She tried them on and said, 'These are too large. They don't fit me.' Tom said, 'Exactly. I wear the pants in this family and I always will. I don't want you to ever forget that.' Then she took off her pants and handed them to him. She said, 'Here-you try on mine.' He did and said, 'I can't get into your pants.' she said, 'Exactly. And if you don't change your smart ass attitude, you never will.' And they lived happily ever after.